Getting back into the dating game is pretty hard especially after a very long relationship. Just imagine this, you’ve been in a relationship for six years. You met her back at college when you were still discovering yourself and she helped you do so. She was with you through all the hardships and joy. Then suddenly, she falls out of love. Sometimes it does happen. So where does that leave you? In your late twenty’s with a huge emotional burden and an overwhelming yearning for “the one” that you lost.
Well to begin with, let me just say that she probably wasn’t “the one”. Because your relationship wouldn’t have ended if she was. So the right way to go about it is to continue looking for “the one”.
But of course, we both know that it isn’t easy. You’ve been out of the dating game for six years and that is a lot of time. So here are a few tips on how to ease back into it.
First and foremost, you should give yourself enough time to get over your ex. Don’t limit yourself to a week. Make it a month or more if you feel that’s what it takes. It isn’t surprising that getting over her would take long seeing as how you’ve spent years together. So take as much time as you need for closure before trying to date again. Dating should be about moving on and you can’t do that with the memory of your ex hanging at the back of your head.
Also don’t try to date for all the wrong reasons. Dating is fun so its players must enjoy it. Date because you want to find someone that you can have a relationship with not because of something else. Don’t date just to show your ex that you have moved on. Don’t date because you want to spite your ex for ending your relationship. Don’t date just because your friends have been harrying you for way too long. Don’t date because you just have to have a girlfriend.
Date because you actually want to. This will help set a proper mind set and will help you attract the right women. Besides women can mostly sense when you’re in it for the wrong reasons so you better not be.
The next thing you need to do is to be comfortable around prospects first before trying to date them. You’re probably still awkward around women after your relationship so don’t hurry into it and turn into an incoherent babbling baboon. You could try to be around women first but don’t have the intention of picking them up.
What you can do is you could hang out with your friends more and be exposed in environments where you can meet a lot of women. For men at this stage, it’ll be easier to ease back to talking to women if dating isn’t their primary objective. If you do this, you’ll assume a more casual approach.
Finally if you’re comfortable enough, you could now ask lots of women. Don’t zone in on a few, try to pickup as much as possible. This will help you build up your confidence in yourself and in no time, you’ll be actively participating in the dating game again.